In keeping with the season, I present the unique lyrics to all 70 of Matt Farley’s Modern Food Christmas songs.
Each song starts with the traditional words, then instead of singing about Figgy Pudding, Matt inserts the foods listed below.
There’s another repeated line about Good Tidings and then he’s back to his custom lyrics for that food.
Enjoy!
| Spotify Link | First Part | Second Part |
|---|---|---|
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Pizza Version) | Now bring us each a slice of pizza, now bring us each a slice of pizza, now bring us each a slice of pizza because we're hungry. | Now bring us each a slice of pizza, now bring us each a slice of pizza, now bring us each a slice of pizza we're hungry for pizza. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chicken Parmesan Version) | Now bring us some chicken parmesan, now bring us some chicken parmesan, now bring us some chicken parmesan we're hungry for parm. | Now bring us some chicken parmesan, now bring us some chicken parmesan, now bring us some chicken parmesan we want chicken parm. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Meatball Subs Version) | Now bring us some meatball subs, now bring us some meatball subs, bring us out some meatball subs, we want meatball subs. | Please can we have some meatball subs, we really want some meatball subs, give us some meatball subs, we sang for you now feed us. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cotton Candy Version) | Now bring us some cotton candy, now bring us some cotton candy, now bring us some cotton candy we want cotton candy. | We really love cotton candy now we want cotton candy so bring us some cotton candy we sang for you so give us cotton candy. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chocolate Chip Cookies Version) | Now bring us chocolate chip cookies, now bring us chocolate chip cookies, please bring us chocolate chip cookies, we'd like chocolate chip cookies. | Come on and give us some chocolate chip cookies, we'd like some chocolate chip cookies, come on and give us some chocolate chip cookies we're hungry for cookies. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chocolate Ice Cream Version) | Now bring us some chocolate ice cream, now bring us some chocolate ice cream, now bring us some chocolate ice cream cmon bring us some chocolate ice cream. | Now bring us some chocolate ice cream, cmon bring us some chocolate ice cream, we really want some chocolate ice cream won't you bring us some chocolate ice cream? |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Coffee Ice Cream Version) | Now bring us some coffee ice cream, now bring us some coffee ice cream, bring us some coffee ice cream, we want coffee ice cream. | Bring us some coffee ice cream we really want some coffee ice cream, we're hungry for coffee ice cream so bring some out now. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Vanilla Ice Cream Version) | Now bring us some vanilla ice cream, please bring us some vanilla ice cream, we're hungry for vanilla ice cream so bring some out now. | We really want vanilla ice cream, we're hungry for vanilla ice cream, cmon give us some vanilla ice cream, we sang for you, give us ice cream. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Apple Pie Version) | Now bring us some apple pie, please bring us some apple pie, we want some apple pie, bring some out please. | We're serious about the apple pie, we need some apple pie, we've been singing all night, now we want some apple pie. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Roast Beef Sandwiches Version) | Now bring us roast beef sandwiches, please bring us some roast beef sandwiches, we each need a roast beef sandwich so get on that now. | Where are the roast beef sandwiches? we really need those roast beef sandwiches, we're hungry for roast beef sandwiches cmon get us some sandwiches. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (French Fries Version) | Now bring us out some french fries, please bring us out some french fries, we're really hungry for french fries so bring us out some french fries. | Where are our french fries we're really hungry for french fries, we've been singing all night all we need are some french fries. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Roast Turkey Version) | Now bring us some roast turkey, please bring us some roast turkey, we'd all like some roast turkey, so please bring us some. | Where is our roast turkey, we're hungry for roast turkey, we're not gonna stop singing until you bring us roast turkey. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Glazed Ham Version) | Now bring us some glazed ham, please bring us some glazed ham, we really want some glazed ham, so bring some out to us. | We're still waiting for glazed ham and we really need glazed ham, come on, bring out some glazed ham, we sang for you now give us ham. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chocolate Cake Version) | Now bring us some chocolate cake, please bring us some chocolate cake, we'd each like a slice of chocolate cake so please bring us some chocolate cake. | Please bring us some chocolate cake, we each want a slice of chocolate cake, come on, bring us some chocolate cake, we sang for you, give us cake. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Buttered Popcorn Version) | Now bring us some buttered popcorn, please bring us some buttered popcorn, we all want some buttered popcorn so bring us buttered popcorn. | Please bring us some buttered popcorn, we'd all like some buttered popcorn, come on, bring us buttered popcorn with lots and lots of butter. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Swedish Meatballs Version) | Now bring us some swedish meatballs, please bring us some swedish meatballs, we'd all like some swedish meatballs, so get us some swedish meatballs. | We'd like some swedish meatballs, so bring us some swedish meatballs, we've been singing for you all night, the least you can do is give us some swedish meatballs. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Bacon Version) | Now please bring us some bacon, yes please bring us some bacon, we all want several slices of bacon to eat. | Please bring us out some bacon, we're hungry for bacon, several slices of bacon for each one of us. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chicken Wings Version) | Now bring us some chicken wings, please bring us some chicken wings, we'd all like several chicken wings so bring those out now. | We'd all like some chicken wings, we're hungry for chicken wings, so bring us out some chicken wings it's the least you can do. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chocolate Milk Version) | Please bring us some chocolate milk, we'd all like some chocolate milk, we really love chocolate milk so please bring us several glasses of it. | Please bring us some chocolate milk, please bring us some chocolate milk, we'd all like some chocolate milk so how bout you bring us out some? |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Iceberg Lettuce Version) | Now bring us some iceburg lettuce, please bring us some iceburg lettuce, we'd all like some iceburg lettuce so how bout you get us some of that? | We're still waiting on that iceburg lettuce, we all want that iceburg lettuce, please bring us some iceburg lettuce, we sang for you so give us lettuce. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Bananas Version) | Now bring us some banannas, yes bring us some banannas, we'd all like some banannas so please bring us some banannas. | We'd all love some banannas, we'd all love some banannas, we sang for you so nicely so give us some banannas. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Mashed Potatoes Version) | Now bring us some mashed potatoes, please bring us some mashed potatoes, we'd all love some mashed potatoes so bring us mashed potatoes. | Please bring us some mashed potatoes, please bring us some mashed potatoes, we're hungry for mashed potatoes so bring us mashed potatoes. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Scrambled Eggs Version) | Now bring us some scrambled eggs, please bring us some scrambled eggs, we'd all love some scrambled eggs so bring us scrambled eggs. | Please bring us some scrambled eggs, we'd all love some scrambled eggs, please bring us some scrambled eggs, we're hungry for scrambled eggs. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Pancakes Version) | Now bring us out some pancakes, please bring us out some pancakes, we'd all love some pancakes so please bring us pancakes. | We're still waiting for the pancakes, we're still waiting for the pancakes, we sang nice songs for you, the least you could do is give us some pancakes. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chocolate Pudding Version) | Now bring us some chocolate pudding, please bring us some chocolate pudding, we'd all love some chocolate pudding so get us some chocolate pudding please. | Please bring us some chocolate pudding, please bring us some chocolate pudding, we'd all love some chocolate pudding, how bout some chocolate pudding? |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Eggs & Bacon Version) | Now bring us some eggs and bacon, please bring us some eggs and bacon, cmon bring us some eggs and bacon, we want eggs and bacon. | We're still waiting for eggs and bacon, we're still waiting for eggs and bacon, we sang so many good songs for you, you should give us some eggs and bacon. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Mac & Cheese Version) | Now bring us some mac and cheese, please bring us some mac and cheese, we'd all love some mac and cheese so bring us some mac and cheese. | We're waiting for mac and cheese, we're waiting for mac and cheese, we'd all love some mac and cheese, so bring us out some mac and cheese. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Watermelon Version) | Now bring us a watermellon, please bring us a watermellon, we all want a watermellon so bring us a watermellon. | We'd all love a watermellon, so bring us a watermellon, we sang for you so wonderfully so give us a watermellon. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chicken Tenders Version) | Now bring us some chicken tenders, please bring us some chicken tenders, we all want some chicken tenders so bring us chicken tenders. | Please bring us some chicken tenders, please bring us some chicken tenders, we de-serve chicken tenders cuz we're singing for you so well. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Granola Bars Version) | Now bring us some granola bars, please bring us some granola bars, cmon bring us some granola bars, we'd each like a granola bar. | We'd really love some granola bars, so bring us some granola bars, cmon bring us some granola bars, we sang for you so give us granola bars. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Beef Teriyaki Version) | Now bring us beef teriyaki, please bring us beef teriyaki, we'd all love some beef teriyaki so bring us beef teriyaki. | Please bring us beef teriyaki, please bring us beef teriyaki, we'd all love some beef teriyaki so bring us some beef teriyaki. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Prime Rib Version) | Now bring us some prime rib, please bring us some prime rib, we'd all love some prime rib so bring us some prime rib. | Please bring us some prime rib, we de-serve some prime rib, we sang for you so well the least you could do is give us some prime rib. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Chicken Nuggets Version) | Now bring us some chicken nuggets, now bring us some chicken nuggets, we'd each like some chicken nuggets so bring us chicken nuggets. | We're hungry for chicken nuggets, 'bout five chicken nuggets per each one of us, some chicken nuggets would make us very happy. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cheeseburgers Version) | Now bring us some cheeseburgers, please bring us some cheeseburgers, we de-serve some cheeseburgers, we sang for you now feed us. | Please bring us some cheeseburgers, we'd all love some cheeseburgers, we're hungry for cheeseburgers, so bring us some cheeseburgers. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Loaves of Bread Version) | Now bring us some loaves of bread, please bring us some loaves of bread, we'd all love some loaves of bread, so bring some out to us please. | We're waiting for our loaves of bread, we're hungry for our loaves of bread, we sang really good songs for you the least you could do is give us some loaves of bread. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Funnel Cake Version) | Now bring us some funnel cake, please bring us some funnel cake, we'd all love some funnel cake, so bring us some funnel cake. | We're waiting for the funnel cake, we're waiting for the funnel cake, we won't leave until you have brought us some funnel cake. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Corn On the Cob Version) | Now bring us some corn on the cob, please bring us some corn on the cob, we'd all love some corn on the cob, so bring us some corn on the cob. | Please bring us some corn on the cob, please bring us some corn on the cob, we sang some good songs for you so give us some corn on the cob. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Grilled Cheese Sandwiches Version) | Now bring us some grilled cheese sandwiches, please bring us some grilled cheese sandwiches, we'd all love some grilled cheese sandwiches, so bring us some now. | Please bring us somgrilled cheese sandwiches, we really want some grilled cheese sandwiches, we're hungry for grilled cheese sandwiches so bring us some of them. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Provolone Cheese Version) | Now bring us some provolone cheese, now bring us some provolone cheese, we'd all love some provolone cheese, so bring us some provolone cheese. | We're waiting for our provolone cheese, we're waiting for our provolone cheese, we sang you some wonderful songs so give us some provolone cheese. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (English Muffins Version) | Now bring us some english muffins, some toasted english muffins, we'd all love english muffins, just make sure they're toasted. | We still want some english muffins, we still want some english muffins, some toasted english muffins, come on bring them out. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Turkey Sandwiches Version) | Now bring us some turkey sandwiches, please bring us some turkey sandwiches, we'd all love some turkey sandwiches, so bring us some turkey sandwiches. | Please bring us some turkey sandwiches, we're hungry for turkey sandwiches, we sang some good songs for you the least you could do is give us some turkey sandwiches. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cherry Soda Version) | Now bring us some cherry soda, please bring us some cherry soda, please bring us some cherry soda, we want cherry soda. | Please bring us some cherry soda, we want some cherry soda, we're hungry for cherry soda so bring us cherry soda. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Shrimp Cocktail Version) | Now bring us some shrimp cocktail, please bring us some shrimp cocktail, we'd all love some shrimp cocktail so bring us shrimp cocktail. | Cmon and bring us some shrimp cocktail, we deserve some shrimp cocktail, we sang some good songs, the least you can do is give us shrimp cocktail. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Sushi Rolls Version) | Now bring us some sushi rolls, please bring us some sushi rolls, we'd all love some sushi rolls, so bring us some sushi rolls. | We're waiting for the sushi rolls, we're hungry for the sushi rolls, we sang you some nice songs now give us some sushi rolls. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Caramel Sauce Version) | Now give us caramel sauce, please give us some caramel sauce, we'd all love some caramel sauce, please give us some of that. | We're waiting for caramel sauce, we won't leave till we've gotten caramel sauce, listen to us sing, now give us caramel sauce. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Glazed Donuts Version) | Now bring us some glazed donuts, please give us some glazed donuts, we all want some glazed donuts, so give us glazed donuts. | We're waiting for the glazed donuts, we're hungry for the glazed donuts, so bring us some glazed donuts, it's the least you can do. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cup of Water Version) | Now bring us some cups of water, please bring us some cups of water, we're very very thirsty so bring us some cups of water. | We're thirsty for the cups of water, we're thirsty for the cups of water, we've been singing so much now, we need some cups of water. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Ramen Noodles Version) | Now bring us some ramen noodles, please bring us some ramen noodles, we're hungry for ramen noodles so bring us ramen noodles. | We're still waiting for the ramen noodles, we're still waiting for the ramen noodles, we're hungry for the ramen noodles, what are you gonna do about it? |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Beef Stroganoff Version) | Now bring us some beef stroganoff, please bring us some beef stroganoff, we all want some beef stroganoff so bring us some beef stroganoff. | Please bring us some beef stroganoff, we're hungry for beef stroganoff, come on give us beef stroganoff, we'd really love some beef stroganoff. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Hot Dogs Version) | Now bring us some hot dogs, please bring us some hot dogs, we'd all love some hot dogs, so bring us some hot dogs. | We're still waiting for the hot dogs, we're still waiting for the hot dogs, we sang some good songs for you the least you could do is give us some hot dogs. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Pickles Version) | Now bring us some pickles, please bring us some pickles, we'd all love some pickles, so bring us some pickles. | We're still waiting for the pickles, we're still waiting for the pickles, we sang a bunch of good songs for you the least you could do is bring us some pickles. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Tacos Version) | Nows bring us tacos, please bring us some tacos, could we please have some tacos, we're hungry for tacos. | I still want some tacos, I still want some tacos, so please give me some tacos, we're hungry for tacos. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Lasagna Version) | Now bring us some lasagna, please bring us some lasagna, we're hungry for lasagna, so bring us some lasagna. | We're hungry for lasagna, we're hungry for lasagna, we sang some good songs for ya so give us some lasagna. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Coffee Cake Version) | Now bring us some coffee cake, please bring us some coffee cake, we're hungry for coffee cake, so bring us some coffee cake (moves away from mic). | We're still waiting for the coffee cake, we're still waiting for the coffee cake, we sang you some good songs so you should give us coffee cake. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Meatloaf Version) | Now bring us some meatloaf, please bring us some meatloaf, we're hungrys for meatloaf so you should bring us meatloaf. | Oh please bring us some meatloaf, we're hungry for some meatloaf, we've sang so many songs for you, you should give us some meatloaf. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Sloppy Joe Version) | Now bring us some sloppy joes, please bring us some sloppy joes, we're hungry for sloppy joes so bring us sloppy joes. | We're still waiting for the sloppy joes, we're hungry for the sloppy joes, we sang you some songs so you should give us some sloppy joes. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Zucchini Bread Version) | Now bring us some zucchini bread, please bring us some zucchini bread, we're hungry for zucchini bread, so bring us some zucchini bread. | We're still waiting for zucchini bread, we're hungry for zucchini bread, we sang some good songs for you, you should give us some zucchini bread. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Ice Cream Cake Version) | Now bring us some ice cream cake, please bring us some ice cream cake, we're hungry for ice cream cake, so bring us some of that now. | We're hungry for ice cream cake, we're hungry for ice cream cake, you should bring us some ice cream cake, cuz we are hungry for it. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Mayonnaise Version) | Now bring us some mayonnaise, now bring us some mayonnaise, we all want some mayonnaise so won't you bring us some mayonnaise? | We're still waiting for the mayonnaise, we're still waiting for the mayonnaise, will you please bring us some mayonnaise, we're hungry for mayo. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Pretzels Version) | Now please bring us some pretzels, now please bring us some pretzels, we're hungry for pretzels so bring us some pretzels. | Oh please bring us some pretzels, oh please bring us some pretzels, we're hungry for pretzels so you should bring us some pretzels. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Green Peppers Version) | Now bring us some green peppers, now bring us some green peppers, we're hungry for green peppers, so bring us some green peppers. | Please bring us some green peppers, please bring us some green peppers, we're hungry for green peppers so bring us some green peppers. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Frozen Pizza Version) | Now bring us some frozen pizza, now bring us some frozen pizza, please bring us some frozen pizza, we want frozen pizza. | Please bring us some frozen pizza, please bring us some frozen pizza, we sang you some songs so you should pay us with frozen pizza. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Minty Gum Version) | Now bring us some minty gum, now bring us some minty gum, we all want some minty gum, so you should bring us some minty gum. | We still want some minty gum and yeah we want some minty gum, please bring us some minty gum so we can chew it. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cinnamon Rolls Version) | Now bring us some cinnamon rolls, now bring us some cinnamon rolls, we all want some cinnamon rolls, so bring us some cinnamon rolls. | Oh please give us some cinnamon rolls, oh please give us some cinnamon rolls, we're hungry for cinnamon rolls so give us some cinnamon rolls. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Gingerbread Cookies Version) | Now bring us some gingerbread cookies, oh bring us some gingerbread cookies, we're hungry for gingerbread cookies, so you should bring us some gingerbread cookies. | We still want gingerbread cookies, we're hungry for gingerbread cookies, you should give us gingerbread cookies, cuz we like them. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Thin Mints Version) | Now bring us some thin mints, please bring us some thin mints, we're hungry for thin mints so you should bring us some thin mints. | Oh please bring us some thin mints, oh won't you bring us some thin mints, we sang this great song for you so you should pay us with thin mints. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cream Puffs Version) | Now please bring us some cream puffs, now please bring us some cream puffs, we're hungry for cream puffs, so you should bring us cream puffs. | We're so hungry for cream puffs, we're so hungry for cream puffs, and we sang you this song, so you should give us cream puffs. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Cannolis Version) | Now please bring us some cannolis, now please bring us some cannolis, we're hungry for cannolis, so bring us some cannolis. | Please bring us some cannolis, we're hungry for cannolis, we sang you this song so you should give us some cannolis. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Tiramisu Version) | Now please bring us some tiramisu, oh please bring us some tiramisu, oh please give us some tiramisu, we want some tiramisu. | Oh please bring us some tiramisu, we really want some tiramisu, we're hungry for tiramisu, cmon give us some tiramisu. |
| Wish You a Merry Christmas (Mozzarella Sticks Version) | Now bring us some mozzarella sticks, please bring us some mozzarella sticks, well bring us, cuz we want some mozzarella sticks. | We still want some mozzarella sticks, bout 5 mozzarella sticks each will do, please give us some mozzarella sticks. |
